Up until very recently, I would have considered myself a shopaholic. I was obsessed with spending money that, frankly, I didn’t have. I loved the thrill of getting something new. I loved the rush of being impulsive and buying something without thinking twice. I always kind of laughed it off, but it wasn’t until recently that I realized it was a habit I needed to break. By no means am I “cured” from the love of shopping (I don’t think I’ll ever be), but over the past 6 months, I have been working really hard to cure my love of spending. I went from getting a high from spending money to getting a high from saving money. These are the 4 main ways that helped me break my spending addiction.
Stop Following Trends
I like to say I can blame TikTok for a lot of my impulsive purchases, but we all know I’ve been a shopaholic long before TikTok came around. But, TikTok definitely didn’t help. This is something I’m still working hard to stop doing, but I’ve gotten better. For a while, I would go on TikTok, see some new product or clothing item, and I’d immediately buy it. If I saw someone else using it and even had one ping of wanting for it, I would buy it. I wouldn’t think twice. I was very caught up in needing what everyone else had. I was putting my own self worth into materialistic items. “Oh, I’ll be cool and they’ll like me if I have this,” and “If she has it, then I need it,” and so on. This was the first habit I had to acknowledge, and more importantly: had to want to break. It was toxic.
I think TikTok and social media can be a great place to find out about new items that you may want. Sometimes I still see something online that I would want or think would be useful for my life. But, instead of getting too trigger happy with that “buy now” button, I first put it on my Want List.
Keep a Want List
When I was first working towards breaking my shopping habit, the Want List was super helpful for me. It’s still something I use, but I notice I’ve been adding to it less and less. It’s crazy how well we can train our brains in such a short amount of time!
Anyways, the Want List is just a place where you write down any item you want with the date you first thought about/saw it. I even add the link, if it’s online. You can decide for yourself how long you want to wait to purchase an item. For me, it was a minimum of 24 hours, and usually a week. More often than not, I’d forget about it after a day or two. But in the situations where I thought about an item everyday for a week, then I considered actually purchasing.
The Want List gives you a way to let go of the initial need to buy without the fear of possibly forgetting about the item. I know that was something hard for me- I was always worried something would go out of stock or I’d forget about it if I didn’t purchase it immediately. My new mindset: if it goes out of stock, it wasn’t meant to be. And if you forgot about it, then you didn’t need it to begin with.
Go Cold Turkey from Online Shopping
I’ll be honest, if I hadn’t moved to a different country, I’m not sure I would have been able to go completely cold turkey from online shopping all together. My online shopping addiction was bad. There was a time where I would have a package arrive every day. Every single day. Amazon just makes it way too easy! I would see something online, open the app, and click Buy Now, all in a 2 minute timespan. It had to end.
Moving to a different country meant it was a lot harder to shop online at a lot of the stores I was used to shopping from (even my amazon.com account would have had to be changed to amazon.it!). Plus, the culture here in the part of Italy where I am is a lot less focused on online shopping. This was a huge transition at first. I was so used to wanting/needing something and having it within 2 days or less. I’m sure I could have figured out how to shop online a lot easier and quicker when I first moved here, but I’m grateful I stayed clueless because it allowed me to completely break the habit.
I made my first Amazon (.it) order this week. This was my first Amazon purchase since October. For someone who used to order from Amazon multiple times a week, this was a huge deal. I shop online occasionally now, but I’ve realized that I am very hesitant before I purchase. I always ask myself if I really need the item and if now is the right time to buy it. I never used to ask those questions. I give credit for my new reflection skills to my love of finance tracking!
Track Your Finances
This was a scary step for me. When I was in the mindset of spending money constantly, I didn’t want to be keeping track of how much I was spending. I wanted to shop ‘til I dropped without having to see the consequences. Obviously, this had to change. The first thing I started doing was keeping a running note in the Notes App where I’d detail everything I spent and why. It probably isn’t the best method, but it was something I always had on me to be able to write down every single penny I spent. Quickly, I started thinking twice before spending money. I was seeing how every purchase added up. It definitely wasn’t as fun as the shopping was, but it was eye opening. Overtime, I added onto this method and I would do it month by month. At the end of each month, I’d add up the total amount I had spent and I’d compare it with how much I made. Then, I put those two numbers at the top so I’d see them all of the next month, almost as a reminder for myself.
This really helped me to be mindful of my spending and think twice before I spent. I started craving seeing less and less days on the list. It became a game- how many days can I go without spending money? I was retraining my brain. I was becoming more and more happy by saving money than by spending.
Obviously the Notes App isn’t the most organized place to keep track of my finances, so I’ve been working on a tool that has really helped me. It’s organized by day and month, so I’m able to track every single expense and then reflect on it later. I took my Notes App idea and made it even better. If that sounds like something that would help you, stay tuned! (wink wink).
Let’s get one thing straight- I love to shop. I have always loved to shop, and I guarantee I will always love to shop. But my love of shopping was never the problem. My love of spending money was the problem. I had to take the time to understand that and figure out what I could do to change it and make shopping work for me instead of against me. But this wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t want to change it. As with absolutely everything in life, if you aren’t willing or wanting to change, then you won’t. That’s the first step.
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